February 3, 2009

Just a simple rambling

First of all, sorry everyone (especially libby!!) for my absense these past few days!! i have so much to update, and unfortunately, time seems to be my biggest enemy right now. i have to talk about the other night! Ever since i had my homebirth (natural delivery obviously) i have not felt "back to normal" down there. i mean, we have had sex for quite some time, but i think because we decided to have sex just a few days after i gave birth, that i didn't allow myself to heal properly. (it was not painful though...and we went easy) Well, i never realized how much this really bothered me until the other night.

Master and i went to bed, and started touching and loving on each other. Of course, one thing leads to another, and well, you can guess the rest! From when Master and i first got together, to right before i became pregnant, He was able to make me orgasm and convulse beyond anything i could ever imagine. It would seriously, never stop....eventually becoming painful and would take me to that deep sub space that is so comforting. Well, unfortunately, i have not been able to experience that since i had the baby. i have had orgasms, but they are painful, or short, and then after i have it? forget it, i'm done lol. i just crash! Well, the other night was different. Master allowed me to orgasm, and it was like how it used to be.

i went so deep, i loved it, i loved Master for allowing me to experience this all again, i loved Master for being right there through it all because honestly, it caught me off guard, and i actually had to deal with some things afterwards. i loved my body for finally healing, and i loved the fact that i was able to release something that i had no idea was bothering me in the back of my mind for quite some time.

Afterwards, i seriously cried. i just laid in Master's arms crying and touching Him gently. i know He had to feel pretty good about it all as well :) i'm so thankful i am finally getting back to pre-baby...even down there! ha. i cant wait for another night like that ;)

Everything else this way is going well. Master and i have just been busy!! We have wedding appointments today, and i have my wedding hair appointment practice scheduled for Friday the 13th! haha. Ummm, should i be worried? So i am just excited for that. The wedding dress i ordered should come in in about 2 more months, and i can not wait to try it on after all the customizing and all :)

Well that's all i have time for.... i am going out with my sister and her kid for lunch! :) Playdate!

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