January 27, 2009

Moving Forward?

Last night was a bit rough. i'm slowly moving on from the hurt, but i am mostly just bummed. Bummed that Master and i continue to allow this person an ability to upset us, and allow anger to be exchanged between the two of us. It makes no sense really. i cant believe, a person who means absolutely nothing to us, can cause so much tension, that Master and i end up hurting eachother.

i understand this situation is very, very stressful; and i know Master and i feel like there is this huge gray cloud above us all the time, but ultimately, this will be over soon (hopefully!) and we can move forward with our lives; being the happy family we usually are :)

Honestly though, when we used to have fights over this person, they were much worse. Last night, we fought, then cooled down, and actually snuggled in bed together, in fact laughing in bed together. So for that, i am thankful. Thankful that we are recognizing the "power" we are letting this person have over us, and seeing that we obviously don't want to continue in this pattern.

Oh, but on a much lighter note.... last night, we were laying in bed, and i received a text message from a friend and started cracking up, Master grabbed the phone and started laughing as well. i went to grab my phone back, and obviously it's dark besides the glow of the phone, and i slammed my nose into Master's elbow. Yes, seriously. i started crying (instinct!) and i was afraid i broke it or it was going to bleed everywhere. Master starts laughing!!!!! lol. Crazy sadist! Well, ok, to His credit, i am pretty sure He was laughing as He checked my nose and all (which, it's not broken, and it didn't bleed!) But it hurt like hell!! Then, Master seriously was cracking up so hard, He had to shove His face in the pillow so the baby wouldn't wake up. i kept telling Him it wasn't funny... that it hurt. And finally, He was like, can you imagine if we had to go to the hospital and explain what happened?

"No doctor, i swear, i slammed my nose into His elbow!"

Sounds like a cover for some serious abuse lol. Oh well. Ultimately, i was laughing, but wow, i really need to learn how to be careful!

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